No Boundaries无界限

最近喜欢上这首英文歌曲。对于我这个从来不欣赏西洋音乐的人是一项突破。如果你不喜欢外语歌就看它的歌词，非常有意思。

Seconds hours so many days
You know what you want but how long can you wait
Every moment last forever if you feel you've lost your way
What if your chances are already gone
Started believing that I could be wrong
But you give me one good reason
To fight and never walk away

Coz hear I am — still holding on!

Every step you climb another mountain
Every breathe it's harder to believe

You'll make it through the pain (or through all your aches and pains)
Weather the hurricane
To get to that one thing

When you think the road is going nowhere
Just when you've almost gave up on your dreams
Then take it by the hand and show you that you can

You can go higher
You can go deeper
There are no boundaries
Above and beneath you
B-reak every rule coz there's nothing between you
And your dreams

Every step you climb another mountain
Every breathe it's harder to believe

Yeah...

There are no boundaries
There are no boundaries

With every step you climb another mountain
With every breathe it's harder to believe
Then take it by the hand and show you that you can

There are no boundaries.
There are now boundaries.
There are now boundaries.

我

有好长的一段日子不想写任何文字，甚至不愿意跟人分享一些心中的感触。我觉得年纪大了，尤其是以我为例，会变得不太希望别人太了解自己。不希望自己的内心世界向外开放。很多时候我喜欢一个人呆在房间里想想事情，多沉淀在记忆或者当下的情绪关口。暑假的到来并没有让我雀跃，心情依旧，没什么两样。学业暂时 可以搁下好好给自己的身心灵充电。

我告诉自己这个漫长的假期一定要重新写一些心情故事给自己的经历留下痕迹。但是信念很薄弱不太想感性也不想太理性。总之我不知如何是好？我心里留下很多的缺口，很多的真空仿佛一切停顿在停滞不前的空间。现在即使写几句话语都让我很尴尬，不知为什么？

我没有完美的人格。从前的一切美好特质只不过是修行过程中堆砌的虚幻人格。真实面对自己的时候还是很迷茫。平时也例常打坐唤醒内在的醒觉与平稳的思维。我喜欢宁静的自己但是面对外在的世界我不得不施展我独具一格的“四川变脸”。八面玲珑非我家所长，雕虫小技我还是游刃有余的。用另一个自我应对外在的世界似乎已经成为每个人的惯例。或许内在与外面的世界来回游走导致我麻木不仁，粉碎了我感性的特质，使我关上了大门。

这几天我看到自己不完美的一面因为我如实地表现出来。确实这种表现在别人身上会造成一定的副作用。我是知道的。也知道当时无法改变什么。我可以克制自己不那么做，其实祸根还在。性格极度倔强是我的死穴。我坚决地认为只要继续观察，不采取马上克制的方式一定要观照直到出离之心升起才是智慧的表现。

不愿做虚伪的主人，甘为自己的坚持与执著而表达真实，为自己的负面行为负责承担业力。我应该是这种人。然而心中还是希望有一天能超然自在。